Pedestal Fans

It is a shattering experience when people you have placed on a pedestal fail to live up to your expectations. Everyone fails in some way or other, and sooner or later you will be upset by that. That realisation can be quite shattering.

I feel it is more important to realise that all people are just that – people. Whether they are rich, poor, uneducated, highly educated, male, female and so on. They are people first.

Rather than aiming to emulate someone else, whom I must therefore put on a pedestal, I try to emulate the me I would like to be, placing myself on a pedestal. I also try to remember that that image of me is just an image, so if I fall short, or fail, that does not make me less than. It just gives me an new way of considering myself.

Often we find ourselves holding onto an old grudge and being more upset at other peoples ignorance of our experiences than they warrant. That off the cuff remark that demonstrates their gross ignorance can seem very personal. Personally, I try to educate in a few brief statements and then let it go. If people prefer to stay ignorant, then that is their choice.

Of course I get angry too. What I try to do with my anger is use it to learn more about me, rather than judging the other. Why do I feel violated (as in a boundary crossed), or dis-empowered? What can I do about it? Often it is something I need to change about myself, which will then change my environment. By changing me, I change you.

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